Bacteria and Bathroom Habits

Over the past few months I've been trying to drink more water, particularly during work. Over the course of my 8-4pm I usually drink between one and two litres of water. But since I've been doing that, I'm also going to the bathroom every 30 minutes and as a result I've had some time to nice some disturbing behaviours and I may have come up with the dirtiest thing on any given body.

First of all, the number of people who don't wash, or fake wash their hands is troubling. You'd think grown men would wash their hands but a good number simply flush, tuck their shirt in and back to work. "Hi Betty, here is my report for you along with some poo particles. You going for lunch in a few minutes?"

A significantly higher number of men do the fake-wash or the bacteria bath. This is when you turn the tap on, rinse your hands for three seconds and consider your hands cleaned. When all that was really accomplished was that you just gave the germs on your hands either a drink or a bath, but either way, they're still there and they're refreshed.

Even if you're from the school of thought that, "Well I don't piss on my hands," it's still a good idea to wash your hands at least a few times a day and since you're in the washroom, you might as well do it then.

One time after relieving myself I came to the conclusion that the dirtiest, most bacteria infested things are not door knobs, toilets, telephones or keyboards, but belt buckles. Whether you wash, fake-wash or don't wash at all, what is the one thing we all do before we are SUPPOSED to wash? We tuck our shirts in and do our pants up, including the belt. (So technically, the pant button and fly are in the same category).

Time and time again, we handle the belt buckle between pissing or dropping a deuce and washing our hands. You can make the valid argument that our pants get washed so the fly and button are not so bad, but I can't say I've ever washed a belt (on purpose) and I wear one of two belts every day, so the germs must be just stacking up. Knowing that brings a whole new level of fear when I think about the times I got the belt for being a retard.

"Oh no! Dad, I'm sorry! Not the belt please! Do you know what's on that thing??!!"

I suppose the proper thing to do would be to do the penguin waddle over to the sink, wash your hands and then do your pants up, but if we can't get 75% of the population to wash their hands with soap, I can't really see that happening.

Speaking of which, it's about 6:30pm. Regularity is great.